Submit your particulars
Share your address, number of distinguished canines, and preferred schedule.
EST. FOR THE CULTIVATION OF NOBLER LAWNS
Carpe Poo Em.
Seize the day. We’ll seize the doo. A most distinguished dog waste removal society for people who expect more from their yard.
◆ No binding contracts◆ Courteous arrival notice◆ Sanitized instruments
The Society StandardThorough, discreet, dependableThe Gatekeeper’s OathEvery gate secured behind usA Clean SlateWaste removed every visit
THE SOCIETY METHOD
A cleaner yard, in three scholarly acts
We patrol the grounds
Your steward arrives, conducts a thorough sweep, and secures the gate.
Reclaim your lawn
Receive confirmation, step outside, and seize the day—cleanly.
MEMBERSHIP DUES
Choose your society standing
Weekly plans include one dog. Add $5 per week for each additional dog. One-time cleanups start at $99. Availability and your final quote are confirmed before service.
Weekly Cleanup
$25 / week
One dog · One visit every week
- Meticulous grounds inspection
- Waste discreetly removed
- Gate photograph upon request
Twice Weekly
$35 / week
One dog · Two visits every week
- Meticulous grounds inspection
- Waste discreetly removed
- Gate photograph upon request
One-Time Rescue
$99+ / cleanup
One-time cleanup · Final quote confirmed before service
- Meticulous grounds inspection
- Waste discreetly removed
- Gate photograph upon request
YOUR LAWN AWAITS
Carpe Poo Em.
We’re in pre-opening and selectively welcoming new members. Request a callback for availability and scheduling.